Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
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