smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
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