I must be too annoying 4 u.
I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
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