I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
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the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
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That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.