:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?