If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I wish my penis had an off switch
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
