there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
OPIZZABONMYDICK
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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