So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Randomize
