Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
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