he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize