I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
