I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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