East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Randomize
