His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
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