do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
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how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
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You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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