i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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