bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
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