found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize
