i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
you would pick up someone in the library
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
