Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
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