What did we do last night that was yellow?
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Randomize
