operation have a gay friend backfired
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
