I'm jealous of your bromance
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize