Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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