we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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