umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize
