I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize