I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
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Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
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Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
This can only be settled by a dance off.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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