Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Randomize
