Me too!
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
