this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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