he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
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