I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
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