Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Randomize