I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
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