I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
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