2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Randomize
