ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
