where does the pee come out of this thing
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Randomize
