OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize
