It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
