I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Randomize
