this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Randomize
