i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
