dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
