How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
Randomize
