Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
