if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
