4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize