Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize
