East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
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