dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
We need to get me chipped asap
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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